Early Days of Spinsterhood

Jenna: Hang on. Why do you have a cat? And a fanny pack? And your ponytail! It’s being held up by a chip clip!
Liz Lemon: …I am making my graceful transition into spinsterhood. I have adopted this cat. Named her Emily Dickinson…
Jack: Lemon, a word. Hang on. Recent break-up, fanny pack, cat . . . Quick! Who is the lead character on NCIS?
Liz Lemon: Special Agent Jethro Gibbs.
Jack: In your office now.

At my age if you're single it means either a) you're divorced b) socially awkward c) career obsessed d) there's something wrong with you or e) all of the above.

As the eternal single girl, being single is exhausting and being in my really-late-twenties-not-yet-thirty-because-that's-gross stage, I can't help but feel as if I'm never going to find a boyfriend. I constantly feel as if I always have to dress my best because 'you never know when you're going to meet somebody.' And according to my mother, that somebody exists either at Starbucks, Barnes and Nobles or the local pizza place.

So what if I haven't had a boyfriend in nearly ten years? That doesn't mean that I'm a lesbian. (Not that there's anything wrong with that). So what if all my friends are getting married, and I'm still drunk? At least I'm not in a relationship just to be in one. And so what if I feel like a sister wife to my best friend and her boyfriend? I really do enjoy spending time with them. Yes, really!

I mean, we've all seen Sex And The City. Being over 30 and single is fabulous, right? Oh, who am I kidding. I'm grabbing my cat and fanny pack and heading out to buy some donuts to watch NCIS.

Don't judge me!